2 am in the mornin with nothin but undies!

Bam! So here you are, standing in the coffee isle trying to pick out which would make the ideal brew for your 2 a.m. drunkin-ness. Will it be the Costa Rican dark or the Fair Trade type that you read about in the world news last Sunday? Or will it even be the generic Folgers, "its a great time waking up when you have Folgers in your cup...yat yat yat," you mumble in your obscured mind. You can't think straight because those cocktails are shrouding both your thoughts and your vision. This all seems like an almost normal trip to store besides the manifesting intoxication until you notice something. A chill just crept over you and the realization that your lower half is cold do to a slight breeze. You think, "no way, this is not really happening," as you look down, your heart sinks to an embarrassing low. You are currently standing in a super market with only your underwear on! Not just any however, your super small pink, lace thong aka your favorite pair. The stun slap wears off and you recognize that you have to do something here! You attempt to stretch your long sleeve shirt over your exposed butt. Slam! Down you go! Drunk, on the ground, and in your underwear you've never felt so liable. The funny thing is that its two in the morning, the only people shopping are in isles over and there isn't many at that, just the weirdo's and people that hate crowds. You stand up with the little dignity you think you have, attempt to stretch the shirt again, and run outside to your car, hoping no one saw you. Once there you start to think of why exactly you were in that predicament in the first place....hmmm....